I agree with a lot of what you said here. As Emma gets closer to three I do see that she is pushing the boundaries a bit more to see what she can get away with. We had to put a stop on throwing toys when she gets frustrated because they became a hazard for Charlotte who was nearby often when she started throwing.

She has her meltdowns from time to time but they usually come when she is tired which is our fault for keeping her out or up later then her usual schedule. When Charlotte came along we saw an increase in meltdowns which usually centered around wanting something RIGHT NOW when I was nursing or otherwise occupied with the baby. We (I) did and do everything we can to reassure her we will get it right away when we are finished with the baby and she gets it now. Having a baby when you have a two year old is tough because they just don't get sharing time at first. This transition was the hardest for us and there were days when I was very frustrated by her behavior. I just kept reminding myself that it was frustrating to her as well and that we just had to get through it together. Now she is concerned when Charlotte is crying and asks where she is when she's napping etc.... she has finally adjusted but it took a while. I think the biggest thing is patience. You've got to have lots of it!!!